At times I really dont bother bearing grudes at people or feel negative about things to make myself feel miserable thats why i always choose the positive side of matter to make myself feel better. But when things piled up and accumulate over time, even the slightest i also cant helped but feel the need to rant and anger starts to build up within which i do not want, its the last thing on my mind as i'm someone that treasures friends very much. Back in school i gave up a potential friendship that will last but due to a stupid mistake, i regretted it till this date. Not so much of friends above everything else but rather its the friendship that i treasured and even when its bumped into any arguments i would want us to resolve it peacefully. 

However for our case, i do not even want to mention it cause i know i cant outwit you in any form of argument no matter how much i have to say about things youve done that disappoints me. I know you have bgr issues & im all ears to hear but this time round i only can do so within my means and i guess the thought of my inconvenience never occur in your mind at all cause the things that you suggests and places to go doesnt seem to accommodate me. Just because you know I always say "okay" and in fact i really dont mind and not angry that ive to travel far, gotta take cab or all the hassle i have to go through just to step out of my house and reach the destination of your choice, without any complaints. I would appreciate very much if you ask where i would prefer due my limitations and not suggesting the place straight.

well yknow I wouldn't object to your place of preference cause its regular place that we always hang but now its not that simple for me at the moment ya..? & also i know no point me objecting and suggesting a place thats closer to home cause you will complain you gonna cab home or like inconvenient to travel back and all. I did not tell you all these and you may think that its all my assumptions like if i suggest and you will say yes but in actual fact from how much i know about you, you wouldnt so i dont even wanna start an argument.

I'm keeping silence about all these as i do not want unnecessary cold wars or whatsoever during this period of time when youre caught up with many things so i understand you and knowing your temper this will not end on a happy note unless youre willing to talk it over and admit you have some faults (which i highly doubt you will) so it shall be buried here and start a fresh new page tomorrow. After much thinking I still cannot believe you can drop things and visit someone else and not for me, even though its just one day but its the thought that counts? and on days i became your backup plan i also didnt complain.

sigh i guess the things i would do when youre injured and your current treatment towards me will be drastically different. probably only when youre in my shoes one day then you'll understand how i feel....... but im sure you wouldnt even feel like heading out AT ALL, not to mention making a trip down to our regular place cause youll complain and ask me to find you at your house instead but for me i still willing to make the effort for you. 

Saying all these in my heart i just hope for some effort to be seen...... well people always say during the tough period the true ones will show up. but why i dont see it from you? sigh the disappointment just builds up as i recollect more n more things so it shall end here.